An Update

Dusting off the old keyboard to pop in and say hello.

It’s been a long time since I’ve made a blog post. There are many reasons for that but the main one is I just don’t have a lot to say. I haven’t been moved to write for some time now.

It’s crazy to look back on my life two years ago. I feel like I had everything together. My shirt business was booming, I was blogging regularly, I loved where I was at in my career, I was home for a full 12 weeks with my newborn, I had just started working on social media management, I had something different to look forward to every day.

It’s not that my life isn’t great right now, it is and I have so much to be thankful for. But things have just changed. The shine has worn off. The mundane day to day has set in.

After a not so great launch earlier this Summer my shirt business is collecting dust in my upstairs hallway. My (then) newborn is a full grown toddler now and I’m working full time nights. I’m prioritizing family right now instead of my career. My newborn days are behind me and I’m settling in to the baby raising years.

Technology in general has me jaded, I lost my entire 4 years of blogging and I’ve had to start completely over on a new site. I’ve lost all of my adobe illustrator files which means all of my original shirt designs, stationery designs, sticker designs, fonts, have disappeared. But at least the adobe team has a sweet little message for me:

What’s the point of building and creating something, pouring my soul into a project for it to just vanish? Technology seems to be telling me to move on. Maybe I should.

I do have a podcast that gets me out of the house every week and I really enjoy chatting with Hannah and Sarah. You can follow us on instagram at Thirty, Crying, and Trying.

In general, aside from the podcast, I’m not inspired to do much more at the moment. Part of me questions if I should get serious about blogging again. Maybe I should go back to school. Maybe I should start teaching again. Maybe I should pursue a job in a larger hospital. Maybe, maybe, maybe.

I visit with old friends and I have very little to share on the “what’s new with you” side of the conversation. I go to work, I raise the boys, I make supper, I clean house, I run supper out to the combine. Rinse and repeat.

I need some inspiration, some mojo, a spark.

And that’s where I’m at at the moment. I’m hesitating to post this because I don’t want to sound whiny but just a little jaded at the moment, being real with you all.

I’ve built so much around The Pink Shoelaces. At one point I was earning a decent income from the blog, my Facebook page, and my shirt shop. I’d hate to throw all of that away but it also just doesn’t interest me anymore like it used to. I used to thrive on having all my irons in the fire, now the fire is out.

Anyway, that’s me in a nut shell. Just hanging in here, waiting for something interesting to come my way. In the mean time, I’ll keep counting my blessings and being thankful for a mundane and drama free life at the moment.

15 responses to “An Update”

  1. Carolyn Sullivan Avatar
    Carolyn Sullivan

    Yes it’s hard to not enjoy what you have. But being addicted to the excitement, the adrenaline rush, the NEW is also dangerous. I have been wondering where you have gone. even if it’s into the Mundane Day to Day Life.

  2. Becky Clay Avatar
    Becky Clay

    Why. To try something new, maybe something you always wanted to learn, craft..anything to spark your imagination! Have you ever wanted or do you cross stitch, quilt, make jewelry, anything and wanted to get better at it, now may be the time…also drama free is always great as is your boys!

  3. Denise Avatar
    Denise

    I feel you with the technology woes. It seems you’re cruising along, then there’s an update and none of your files are compatible/corrupted/just disappear!
    Creative businesses are hard! You invest money, space, planning, and tonnes of time so it’s very hard to know when to stop. Don’t worry about other peoples’ expectations – try to focus on making your days successful to you! Success for me is supper every night, a real conversation with my son and husband, and focusing on what I did accomplish that day (instead of the mountain of chores left)!

  4. Paula S. Avatar
    Paula S.

    As a grandmother, I can tell you that this is a phase we all go through at some point. Find some small thing you’re really wanting to try and see what happens. I had always wanted to learn to knit and finally did that after walking into a local yarn shop one day. It was the best thing for me at the time; calmed my nerves and helped me get over some losses I was going through. Plus, I learned how to make some beautiful things that I gave away.

  5. Hedy Avatar
    Hedy

    I’ve always thought you need to just Stop. You are always doing something. I went to a meeting a long time ago for Adult Children of Alcoholics and the speaker said we need to just BE. She said we should adopt the Bee as our symbol to remind us, so I have. Just Be. It’s OK to be a wife, a mother and a nurse. That’s quite a lot to be. How about being Kalissa? You are perfect as you are.

  6. Carolyn Avatar

    I wonder if most mums/wives/daughters/sisters go through this stage in their life. I have memories of crying in the shower, wondering if this is all there is? I was a teacher, mum, daughter, sister and we ran a small hobby farm. It seems like everyone else was a priority and not me. I kept it all running smoothly and made sure bills were paid, attended all my kid’s and husband’s sports activities, did the grocery shopping, kept the barn stalls clean, walked the dogs (which was my best time of the day) and lived with lots of lists of things that I had to take care of. As my kids grew, sometimes it got worse. Teenage daughters were brutal for me to raise. But, I had a wonderful mother in law, sister in law and my own mum who were my support team as well as awesome women at work that were supportive which is what makes me think we all go through those times in our lives and eventually, life moves on and changes. In retrospect, I think that taking some night school classes and discovering quilting was my saviour as well as going to the gym. Find time for you and try some different options. I think it is mundane and daily tasks that need to be done that make our lives seem like we are putting one foot in front of the other. This is a phase that will pass… one morning you will have all three boys in school and some time for you. Being a working mum is tough but it helps with the financial side of family life so it is worth it in the end. Hang in there… I feel so bad for everything you lost but we can’t go back, we all need to move forward. Sadly, learning lessons the hard way is tough. There is a light at the end of your tunnel.

  7. Heidi S Avatar
    Heidi S

    The shine has worn off could describe me and my life at various places. At those times I felt like I was the most unimportant speck on the planet. Then life and something interesting happened and it was fun again. Some of us need to reinvent ourselves from time to time.

    You have some good advice on here. I encourage you to step back and enjoy some past pursuits – plan a bike ride after harvest maybe. And echo the advice to consider new activities. I found a lot of satisfaction from volunteer opportunities and being involved in my kids activities. Baseball, scouts, drama, softball, livestock and dog shows. Now my kids are grown and I’m once again reinventing my life as an empty nester.

    Get some rest. Have some fun. You will find your spark again.

  8. Rhonda L Russell Avatar
    Rhonda L Russell

    I think this is something that a lot of mothers go through. You’re so busy raising your kids that you don’t have the time nor the energy to do those things you did before kids or when your kids were babies and slept a lot. I remember when my boys were younger and my co-workers would ask me what my hobbies are and I would respond, “Raising my kids!” At that time, I didn’t have time for hobbies because, outside of work, they were my life! Then they grew up and I got my hobby time back! One day your kids will be old enough that they will be able to do more things on their own and you will have more time and energy to invest into those things that you loved to do, or try new things! Sometimes in life we just need to get through the mundane phase to get to the exciting phase!

  9. Dotti Hossler Avatar
    Dotti Hossler

    There is a season for everything. Friends go in and out of lives. Interests change because sometimes mastering something is the adrenaline rush that gets you going. And later it becomes “mundane”. Each phase we go through builds our lives. Builds our confidence. Each job we have gives us knowledge to take to the next. Change can be good. This is your questioning season, it will pass and you will have gleaned something from it. Enjoy those toddler, they soon will off to college. Dotti in CT

  10. kit Avatar
    kit

    yup, life caught up to you. it does to all of us. don’t let the internet fool you. raising kids and having a family is tough. somewhere, you will come out in the end. it will just happen one day and it will be right. sorry, mine came when my kids were about 8 and 11 !! lol. who knew. a good friend to talk to who is also in your same pink shoes, and can be honest, is the best therapy to realize that you are indeed normal and in no need of keeping up with anyone but yourself! hugs to you dear.

  11. Debra Broyles Avatar
    Debra Broyles

    Oh my goodness Kalissa. You have had so much on your plate for so long that it’s a “time for me” period. You love cross stitching so spend some time at retreats. Make life fun again. I’m so sorry you lost all of your data for your shirt-making business. It seems to me like you were so busy that you got yourself overwhelmed and burned out. Slow down. Life is too short!!! I know you’ve probably heard that a thousand times. Perhaps a little mini-vacay with hubby for a weekend would give you a little peace of mind. I feel for you, I’ve been there and it does get better. It is just going to take time. You are still very young and time is on your side. Carver and Gannon should be able to help around the house with Anders and do a little housework to give you a little bit of peace. Sit down, put your legs up, read a book, cross stitch, put something for supper in the crockpot in the morning, forget about everything. Take a deep breath – get a nice cold glass of iced tea (with plenty of ice) and sit. Blessings on the way to you Kalissa. God bless you and the family.

  12. BRENDA Avatar
    BRENDA

    i think something as simple as an inexpensive lined notebook and pen or pencil. On the outside cover write/print gratitude journal and each evening list at least 5 things you were grateful for that day. It can be the same or different each day. the exercise of thinking about the day to record those items or events and writing them is so therapeutic. TRY IT, YOU WILL LIKE IT !

  13. Kate Avatar
    Kate

    Like so many have said, this seems to be a phase of life and just remember “this, too, shall pass.” You are such a good mom and it seems like a very good nurse, and a great daughter! So sorry about all you lost files. Technology is great until…..

  14. BRENDA Avatar
    BRENDA

    Did Kayla manage to help you keep the pink shoelaces without the files but at least the name so folks can find you. ??
    Would some of your customers sending pictures of your work that they ourchased help you recrate the stolen designs ???

  15. The Joyful Quilter Avatar

    There’s something to be said for a mundane and drama-free life, Kalissa. Try to be patient. Your next big thing will come along at some point. Although, you may have to wait for all the boys to be in school (or out of school) to have the headspace for something else new and exciting. Until then enjoy those boys and all of their activities!

    I’m sorry you lost all of your blog content. That stinks big time! The internet’s a wonderful thing… until it’s not. It had to feel like a punch in the gut and such a huge loss.

    Know that we’re still here, if you feel like doing an update sometime. Take care!

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